Today’s words to ponder:
6year girl 1: “You got one ear bigger than the other because your dad married his cousin.”
6year old girl 2: “No he didn’t. He married Mommy.”
6year girl 1: “Yes!! You can Google it or ask my dad. It’s true.”
So, after my initial shock, hoping that I wouldn’t be asked to clarify this question, I coached myself, “Act casual. Say nothing. They’ll move on to another topic soon.” And, thank goodness, in typical six-year-old impulsiveness, they were on to another topic before I could completely digest this unexpected outburst and I wasn’t asked for clarification. Discussing incestuous relationships is definitely not in the realm of my professional expertise or personal comfort arena.
I can’t even count the number of times I’ve said to my young students, “It’s best if you ask Mommy and Daddy about that” in response to the countless topics our students with inquiring minds and heavy hearts constantly present to us. Questions that come to mind are: “Is it possible to marry your cousin?”, “Mom says two guys can’t get married. Is this true?”, “Daddy says Santa Claus, Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy all know exactly when we go to sleep and they will never come over unless we are asleep. Is it true?” “My momma says our P.E teacher Ms. Smith is too fat to be a P.E teacher. Is she too fat?” “Dad says Democrats are a bunch of idiots. Are they?” “Mommy says it’s not so bad if she only smokes 5 cigarettes a day. Is this true?”
On numerous occasions my young students have blurted out private information about which Mommy and Daddy would be absolutely horrified to know their child’s teacher knows. Topics like Dad’s smelly farts and the stinky bathroom when he finishes in there in the morning, Uncle Eddie slapping his teenage son Danny when he drinks too much Jameson, Mommy’s high pitched voice when their child enters their bedroom unannounced when Mom and Dad have no clothes on, Mommy sometimes sleeping on the Family Room couch after big arguments with Daddy, Mommy’s cigarette-smelling breath and her yellow teeth, Dad’s habit of sleeping without pajamas and the list goes on. These topics have all managed to make their way into the walls of our classroom and from time to time, into our Meeting Circle for all of us to hear.
On the flip side, parents have often repeated to me some details about my teaching practices. They’ve demonstrated verbatim conversations like our subtraction strategy of “visiting a neighbor next door to borrow a ten”, how we find the perimeter of our school’s playground, how we identify run-on sentences and use The Sandwich Method to write a ‘juicy paragraph’ —the two pieces of bread being the Topic and Conclusion sentences and the ‘stuff in the middle’, Juicy Details, how we use our five senses to describe artifacts, and the like.
Parents have demonstrated to me exactly how I stand as I navigate our Smartboard. They’ve recited “Ms. B’s list of Banned Boring Words and Phrases” (nice, good, big, said, and then, like…). They’ve told me correctly my favorite colors, movies, sports, meals, restaurants and travel destinations. They’ve accurately repeated the names and ages of my mom, dad, sisters, boyfriends and pets. They’ve told me my weight, shoe size, dress size and real hair color and that they know I’ve never worn braces, broken any bones or attended sleep away summer camps.
And so, the moral of the story is: When you work with young children, no information is sacred. Watch what you say and do at all times.
And, about the notion: “Yes! You can Google it.” Now, that’s a whole other fascinating topic! Stay tuned…
Wisekid Chit-Chat 